Kids Say (and do) The Darndest Things!

Sooo.... I just am loving my kids these days. Connor has such a sweet personality (about 75% of the time) and Haylie is at an age where she "knows it all" and she is NOT afraid to tell anyone the way it's supposed to be! It seems like when it rains, it pours, with the crazy things they have been saying and doing the last few days. So, I have been writing them down because I just can't quit giggling when I think about them.

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Let's start with Connor on the toilet.

Connor: Mom, can you come wipe me.
Me: (Enter bathroom) Phew Connor. That's stinky.
Connor: Yeah, it's a snake one. It will BITE you!
Me: (Pretend to be scared) OH NO!
Connor: There. I tootied on it. It won't bite you now. :)

How sweet, looking out for his momma. :)

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Today, Connor wore a button up shirt with a sweater over it, to church. Right before sacrament, he got hot and wanted to take his sweater off. So, Joe took it off for him. Apparently he was still a little warm, because he started to unbutton his shirt.

Joe: Connor, what are you doing?
Connor: I'm hot. I want to take off my shirt.
Joe: Bud, you can't take off your shirt. Then you will be naked!
(Church goes dead silent as the sacrament is about to be blessed)
Connor: But, I don't have a weenie on my tummy!

Now, how smart is that? Of course it's ok to take off your shirt. He's not naked because no one can see his privates. Duh!?! Strip away, my son!

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This evening, we were on our way home from a family dinner at my grandma's and Haylie decided Connor needed a lesson in table etiquette.

Haylie: Connor, we don't chew with our mouth open. It's very bad manners. Jesus Christ doesn't like it and Heavenly Father doesn't like it. And the Gospel will be so so so sad.
Connor: Yeah.
Haylie: Yeah, Jesus Christ will be so sad and Heavenly Father will just kick us out of town!
Connor: Yeah.

*SIGH*

Please tell me I am not the only one.