Danner

So this is NOT a happy post... consider yourselves forewarned.

I just don't understand life. Why do things happen the way they do? I know there's a reason for everything, but why does it all dump on "you" at the same time?

Last week in RS, the lesson was on prayer. A lady was talking about how her family had had a really crappy day, but earlier in the week had decided to make a goal of only "Thank yous" during prayer. So, as they sat down to pray as a family, her husband started out, "Heavenly Father...................." She said it was silent for a while. He finally said, "Thank you that this day is over."

I couldn't agree more.

So, yesterday was 3 weeks that little Louis disappeared. It's sort of sinking in now. I try not to be sad about it, but sometimes... just can't help it. I'm convinced that he is in a good home, and is happy with his new hermit owner.

Today, Joe took the day off. We did a bunch of work in the yard and had a great morning! We came in for lunch, and then the kids went down for naps... We bought some fruit and vegetable plants and thought we'd take the opportunity to get them in the ground, since the kids were sleeping. Well, my mom had given us some railroad ties for our yard, and they were laying on the dirt where our garden is, so Joe needed to move them before we could get started. He moved the majority- we planted- and then he started moving the rest. As I was walking away from the garden, I heard a yelp. Danner got too close. I won't go into details.... but we lost our pup. It was the most awful day ever. We have all just been a wreck. It wasn't pretty and Joe is so upset... I just can't understand. Why me? Why us? Is it worth it to have pets? At this point, I'm thinking no.

So I'm sitting here, wondering what can I learn from this? What good could come out of this? Less dog food? Less barking? Is it really worth it? It's so surreal... like it never happened. Just doesn't seem possible, ya know? First Louis.. then Danner? Is Heavenly Father trying to tell us something about the number of pets we "should" have? I know it probably doesn't work that way, but still...

So, at the end of my day, I'm thinking about what I will pray about tonight. I can think of nothing to be thankful for... that we got the garden planted? Seems so unimportant. That Joe got to stay home from work? Now I'm wishing he would have gone.

My children were sleeping. Inside. Now there's something to be thankful for. My children are alive. My husband is alive. I am alive. We loved Danner very much and we will always miss him.